Monday, May 2, 2011

is it small little things?

at last, i got some time to update my blog
Macbeth dramatization, exhibition, competition  onwards
plus..i was in AKAL 
( Akademi Profesionalisme dan Kepimpinan Al-Ghazali )
since 29th until yesterday
in Ma'ahad Tahfiz Al-Fityan, Yan, Kedah

it was widely open before but i got it stitched
so it can filter what should go in and out

my heart was sorely confused and perplexed right now
after being there and 
at first, wanted a nice slow talk as 'usual'
"people always be like that"
___ said
"ni mesti sebab kem, jadi lain"
___ again
"perlukah berubah? sekarang tak baik?"
and i was so down

please understand that,
you are important
you have a big influence in my life
if not, i dont have to ask
most important
i didnt ask for PERMISSION
i asked because i want to know your reaction

i didnt say yet what i want to change
i just said i 'think' that i need some changes
but the feedback was already that NEGATIVE

mind and heart
soul and body
aching right now
i really into the thought that i got when i was in AKAL
but my heart still have that feeling
berat! sangat! susah! kata orang!
none matters
what matter most
is me myself
please, do help me

i really need help from you

komitmen itu tarbiyah
im proud, i was there
even though there's so many things need to be done
i got stressed over going or not
after all
its done, finish
and im glad, grateful to all

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